The Magnificent Seven (1960, Directed by John Sturges) English Good Film

Starring Yul Brynner, Steve McQueen, James Coburn, Charles Bronson, Robert Vaughn, Brad Dexter, Horst Buchholz, Eli Wallach, Vladimir Sokoloff, Rosenda Monteros

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-Good Film-

You forget one thing. We took a contract.

It’s sure not the kind any court would enforce.

That’s just the kind you’ve got to keep.

Based on Akira Kurosawa’s masterpiece, Seven Samurai, The Magnificent Seven moves the story to the old west, south of the border, to a small village in Mexico. Terrorized routinely by a nearby gang of thugs, led by Calvera (Wallach), the village has had enough and looks to hire outsiders to come and protect them. They find honorable drifters, Chris Adams (Brynner) and Vin Tanner (McQueen), who do the work of assembling a team that includes the soft-hearted local mercenary, Bernardo (Bronson), the mysterious outlaw, Lee (Vaughn), the fortune-seeking friend of Adams, Harry (Dexter), the young hot-head, Chico (Buchholz), and my personal favorite, laconic Britt (Coburn). The Magnificent Seven works from an infinitely promising premise. There have been a number of variations of this theme; the bereaved town, the stranger who comes to save them (or in this case strangers). It’s a thrill and The Magnificent Seven adds to this an iconic score and an indelible cast of some of the coolest guys to ever grace the screen. If it pales in comparison to Seven Samurai, that’s okay, most films do.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

Prince of Foxes (1949, Directed by Henry King) English Good Film

Starring Tyrone Power, Orson Welles, Wanda Hendrix, Marina Berti, Everett Sloane, Felix Aylmer

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-Good Film-

I never cut a throat without knowing whose it is or why I’m cutting it.

In the beginning years of the 16th century, Andrea Orsini (Power) serves the ruthless Prince Cesare Borgia (Welles). Hired to assassinate the kindly, wise Count Marc Antonio Verano (Aylmer), Orsini begins to question his allegiances just as he falls for the count’s young wife, Camilla (Hendrix). Prince of Foxes is an expertly crafted swashbuckler and star vehicle for Power, who may be the king of swashbucklers (Errol Flynn being his chief competitor for this title). Orson Welles is charismatic and riveting as Cesare Borgia. There’s no shortage of plot or intrigue either.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964, Directed by Nicholas Webster) English Horrible Film

Starring John Call, Leonard Hicks, Vincent Beck, Bill McCutcheon, Victor Stiles, Donna Conforti, Pia Zadora, Chris Month

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-Horrible Film-

What’s soft and round and you put it on a stick, and you toast it in a fire, and it’s green?

I don’t know what?

A Martian mellow.

Occasionally, maybe once a decade, a film comes out with an utterly absurd concept and, against all odds, is a hit. Who would have bet on Babe (1995) or Ratatouille (2007) being good films based solely on their stories? But Santa Claus Conquers the Martians doesn’t have nearly the level of talent behind the scenes that those two films had. Instead, it’s exactly as bad as you probably imagine it being just reading the title, and the title was clearly the whole point (someone was really proud to have come up with this title). On the planet Mars, otherwise satisfied children watch television with Earth programming (for some reason) and envy our planet’s rich Christmas tradition; specifically, the tradition of Santa giving presents. Mars’ leader, Kimar, notices his kids’ longing and sets out to kidnap Santa, bringing him to make toys for the Martians. There’s no reason to belabor the faults of this movie. They’re obvious and inevitable. Maybe with more self-awareness and a sense of humor someone could make a decent family flick with this material. The creators of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians opt, however, for earnestness and sincerity. The result is a classic bad movie that’s actually fun to watch despite it all.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

Hi Diddle Diddle (1943, Directed by Andrew L. Stone) English Good Film

Starring Adolph Menjou, Pola Negri, Billie Burke, Martha Scott, Dennis O’Keefe, June Havoc

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-Good Film-

You know, I’ve seen that girl somewhere before.

She’s a very particular friend of the director who’s making this picture. He sticks her in every scene he can.

It’s kind of wild seeing a movie from the 1940s break the fourth wall as frequently and as cleverly as Hi Diddle Diddle does throughout its brisk runtime. Meta humor, so-called, seems like a modern invention but watching Bob Hope and Bing Crosby’s Road To…movies and now this has taught me otherwise. Adolph Menjou stars as Hector, a loving but crooked father whose son, Sonny, is getting married to a nice, respectable girl, Janie (Scott), from a seemingly affluent family. Finding, however, that the girl and her family have suddenly been thrust into dire straits, Hector is asked to use his old tricks to make things right. There’s a lot that goes on in this picture including animated shorts, musical numbers, and plenty of witty dialogue. It’s all done to amusing if rather slight effect.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

If You Could Only Cook (1935, Directed by William A. Seiter) English Good Film

Starring Herbert Marshall, Jean Arthur, Leo Carrillo, Lionel Stander, Frieda Inescort, Gene Morgan

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-Good Film-

Hello, Cookie. The Chief wants to see you in the living room. Toots sweet!

Out of the Great Depression came Hollywood’s golden age and many of its most charming movies, If You Could Only Cook being a nice example, though at around 70 minutes and with a premise familiar to anyone who’s seen a romantic comedy, this film can hardly be considered complex. Herbert Marshall plays a rich, car designer named James Buchanan. Unhappily engaged to a socialite gold-digger, James meets a woman, Joan Hawthorne (Arthur), in the park who’s desperate to find employment. She laments that the only job available to her, private cook, requires her to have a husband who can work as butler. James, being intrigued by the young woman, decides to help, and the two, pretending to be married, unwittingly become servants for a gangster, Mike Rossini (Carrillo). This is a really lovely movie. One in which all the characters are lovable, even the gangsters. Jean Arthur is one of my favorite movie stars and Marshall, who I am less familiar with, is fantastic here.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

The Sea Hawk (1940, Directed by Michael Curtiz) English Great Film

Starring Errol Flynn, Claude Rains, Brenda Marshall, Alan Hale, Flora Robson, Gilbert Roland, Una O’Connor, Donald Crisp

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-Great Film-

In recognition of your valiant services, I pronounce you a Knight of the Realm. Rise, Sir Geoffrey Thorpe.

Reteaming the director, Michael Curtiz, with the swashbuckling star, Errol Flynn, and joined by a familiar cast of supporting players (Claude Rains and Alan Hale), The Sea Hawk is every bit as rousing and entertaining as their previous work, The Adventures of Robin Hood. Flynn plays an English privateer, Geoffrey Thorpe, loyal to his Queen, Elizabeth (Robson), caught up in the political maneuvering of rival Spain preparing their legendary armada. Brenda Marshall plays Flynn’s love interest, a Spanish subject who initially despises Thorpe. Masterful action sequences, compelling characters including a fantastic turn from Flora Robson as the Queen, and plenty of intrigue which I always find fascinating. The Sea Hawk is a testament to the classic Hollywood studio system which made countless great films.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

Tony Rome (1967, Directed by Gordon Douglas) English Mediocre Film

Starring Frank Sinatra, Gena Rowlands, Jill St. John, Sue Lyon, Richard Conte

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-Mediocre Film-

Miami Beach. Twenty miles of sand looking for a city. Twenty miles of pure jerks. Florida orange juice. That’s about the only thing I’ve been enjoying since I’ve been down here.

Frank Sinatra plays former cop, private detective Anthony Rome, who gets sucked into a jewelry theft turned homicide by his former partner. Working for a wild young heiress to retrieve some missing diamonds leads to a world of pimps, strippers, abortionists, and blackmailers. It also leads to Ann Archer (played by Jill St. John, who went on to play a Bond Girl in Diamonds are Forever). Tony Rome is textbook private detective stuff- your seedy customers, femme fatales, easy case turned complex-but I like that stuff. Still, the film is in need of some fresh perspective or material. Similar to my qualms with Harper (1966) or Marlowe (1969), the sixties counter-culture era doesn’t lend itself to effective noir. The aesthetics are wrong in my opinion.  This being said, the film is an easygoing, uncomplicated neo-noir and a solid star turn from Sinatra.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

The Killing (1956, Directed by Stanley Kubrick) English Great Film

Starring Sterling Hayden, Elisha Cook Jr., Marie Windsor, Vince Edwards, Coleen Gray, Jay C. Flippen, Timothy Carey

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-Great Film-

None of these men are criminals in the usual sense. They’ve all got jobs. They all live seemingly normal, decent lives. But, they’ve got their problems and they’ve all got a little larceny in ’em.

Not a Stanley Kubrick scholar or a filmmaker, I can’t see much connection between The Killing (his first feature-length film) and the classics he made subsequently. Where his most famous films like The Shining or 2001: A Space Odyssey are epic and ambiguous, The Killing is almost the direct opposite. It’s a testament, then, to his skill that he directed these films, and that each one is, in its own way, a great one. The Killing follows a group of men, led by Johnny Clay (Hayden), who plan to knock off the local horse track in the middle of a race. Their planning is thorough, but even the best laid plans go astray, especially in crime flicks. This is one of the best; perhaps, it is the best. Efficient, striking, low-key, with the perfect faces to fit each role. Marie Windsor is rightfully famous among film buffs for her femme fatales. She’s just so hateful. Not a minute seems wasted on the way to a poignant finish.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

Yellow Sky (1948, Directed by William A. Wellman) English Good Film

Starring Gregory Peck, Anne Baxter, Richard Widmark, John Russell, Harry Morgan, Robert Arthur, James Barton

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-Good Film-

Hell is empty
And all the devils are here

As far as I’m concerned, uncouth as I am, William Shakespeare’s greatest contribution was to film; the inspiration he gave to so many different movie scripts. Yellow Sky, a very fine, surprisingly brutal western starring Gregory Peck and Richard Widmark, springs from Shakespeare’s The Tempest. Peck leads a band of thieves across a scorching desert until they finally reach an apparently abandoned old western town. There, they meet an old prospector who goes by “Grandpa” and his beautiful granddaughter who goes by “Mike” (Baxter). The thieves are smart enough to see that the two are holding out on something, probably gold. Peck and his gang stick around and, in the meantime, jostle around for attention from Mike. Much rougher than most westerns from this era, even Peck is less lovable hero than forgivable rogue.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-

Merrily We Live (1938, Directed by Norman Z. McLeod) English Great Film

Starring Constance Bennett, Brian Aherne, Billie Burke, Alan Mowbray, Patsy Kelly, Ann Dvorak, Tom Brown, Clarence Kolb, Bonita Granville, Marjorie Rambeau

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-Great Film-

Shakespeare was right when he said… oh, I don’t know what he said, but Shakespeare was right!

The 1930’s screwball comedy period gave us so many wonderful classics. Merrily We Live may not be in the same class as, say, My Man Godfrey which it was clearly inspired by, but it is still very good. The wealthy Kilbourne’s have suffered for some time from the eccentric matriarch, Emily’s (Burke), commitment to hiring homeless men to be the family valet. One unqualified valet after the other has stolen goods and left in the middle of the night. Then one day, E. Wade Rawlins (Aherne), rolls in, looking destitute and is hired on the spot. While the family waits for him to do what every valet before him has done, they slowly find themselves growing attached to him; especially the eldest daughter, Geraldine (Bennett). Terrific cast with Billie Burke as the mother stealing the show, Merrily We Live gives us one great line after another.

-Walter Tyrone Howard-